It’s been ages since I’ve posted on the blog, having taken a break and ultimately deciding to share our most relevant life updates (our pregnancy announcement and gender reveal) over on Instagram for a bit. That being said, this space is still my favorite, and I want share here what I wrote on posts and stories in honor of Mother’s Day, where it will have a more permanent home.
As someone who struggled to get pregnant for years, Mother’s Day is a complex time for me. As I wrote in 2020, my journey to motherhood was “especially challenging on this day of all days, the one that I feel so drawn to but am not really a part of.” What a weird and wonderful and wild feeling to sit here now, snuggling my boys with our baby girl on the way.
I naively thought that since the process of getting pregnant was such a challenge for us, being pregnant would be less so. Alas, I was quite wrong. And yet, despite all of the discomfort and sickness, I finally feel a bit of magic as I enter my 23rd week. After years of feeling discouraged and disappointed with my body and our struggle to get and stay pregnant, I am in awe of that same body doing exactly what it’s supposed to do right now. Every day I watch it grow and feel our baby girl grow within me. I feel her flutters and her kicks and wiggles and it’s truly unlike anything I’ve ever experienced, nor thought that I could or even would. My same body is carrying me through this pregnancy and will ultimately bring our baby into the world. It’s a lot to process, that’s for sure.
The journey to motherhood looks and feels different for everyone. The feelings are big and complex. And if you are dealing with or have dealt with infertility or loss, it can be especially brutal. So can this day. Whether today is wonderful or exciting or horrible or beautiful or heartbreaking or something else, for whatever reason, remember that your feelings are valid. You are on a path that is YOURS, and putting one foot in front of the other is still worth celebrating. All of my love ♥️
